---"The Ring of a Decade", Shanghai, 2019.12 | 《圈里圈外》摄于上海

Only a Decade

---"The Ring of a Decade", Shanghai, 2019.12 | 《圈里圈外》摄于上海

—“The Ring of a Decade”, Shanghai, 2019.12 | 《圈里圈外》摄于上海

 

“You are too short to teach.”

 

---"The View in a Classroom", Shanghai, 2019.10 | 《教室一隅》摄于上海

—“The View in a Classroom”, Shanghai, 2019.10 | 《教室一隅》摄于上海

 

A tall interviewer called me off the stage when I had just given my name. He gestured at me as if he was giving the death penalty. Teaching was the only iron rice bowl that would fit my circumstances. Now what was I supposed to do?

 

---"Teaching Kids Chess", Shanghai, 2019.11 | 《教小朋友国际象棋》樊老师摄于上海

—“Teaching Kids Chess”, Shanghai, 2019.11 | 《教小朋友国际象棋》樊老师摄于上海

 

Days before the 2009 Spring Festival, I desperately paid an agent who guaranteed me a teaching job. On Chinese New Year’s Eve, I took a smelly night train from Hainan to Guangzhou. It was a nightmare. I slept standing against a strange shoulder in the crowd without any awareness. Everyone was leaning against each other, except those who could afford a seat.

 

---"Teaching Kids Chess", Shanghai, 2019.11 | 《教小朋友国际象棋》樊老师摄于上海

—“Teaching Kids Chess”, Shanghai, 2019.11 | 《教小朋友国际象棋》樊老师摄于上海

 

The nightmare worsened when I arrived at a suburban dormitory provided by the agency. There were twelve bunk beds in a room and twelve people shared the same shower with a single toilet. Two days later, the toilet blocked. The shitty water ran all over the place. It smelled really good. No plumber would come till after the Spring Festival. Thus the daily instant noodles had no smell.

 

---"Teaching Kids Chess", Shanghai, 2019.11 | 《教小朋友国际象棋》朱老师摄于上海

—“Teaching Kids Chess”, Shanghai, 2019.11 | 《教小朋友国际象棋》朱老师摄于上海

 

This pushed me to get a job sooner. But they all rejected me for the same reason – my small size and my weak appearance. Not until one month later did I find a school that was calling for half-pay volunteers. I took it immediately.

 

---"Watching Sunset", Shantou, 2009.12 | 《看日落》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

—“Watching Sunset”, Shantou, 2009.12 | 《看日落》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

 

The school was the Migrant Workers’ Children School in Shantou City. It looked like a small factory, but it had a nice cozy feel. There were seven classrooms for seven grades of students. All desks and chairs were blue plastic. All teachers were either retired or fresh graduates. At 5pm every day, we would each carry a bucket of hot water to the toilet and together stand on the squat for a quick shower. Of course, the sexes were separate.

 

---"Observing Series I", Shantou, 2009.12 | 《观察系列一》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

—“Observing Series I”, Shantou, 2009.12 | 《观察系列一》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

 

During the first week, two school buses took us to the three main areas where most of the workers lived. We gave them handouts like a communist would hold a farmer’s hands in the Mao era. There was a fascination in that, on the bus, I was reading Meditations by Marcus Aurelius and, off the bus, I was experiencing a meditative moment of walking into the irregularly shabby tents that were home to them. Especially the moment when a woman bent over the waste digging gold with her face covered by flies.

 

---"Observing Series II", Shantou, 2009.12 | 《观察系列二》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

—“Observing Series II”, Shantou, 2009.12 | 《观察系列二》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

 

This sight motivated me to teach more responsibly and to seek more diversities in life. I noticed that the parents smiled often and the children were happy. I found my students’ neat resonant reading voices tranquilly peaceful. I was totally drawn by these books in Chinese: The Interpretation of Dreams and The Second Sex. Meantime I focused my weekends on writing my Chinese novel – An Oasis in Wasteland.

 

---"Observing Series III", Shantou, 2009.12 | 《观察系列三》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

—“Observing Series III”, Shantou, 2009.12 | 《观察系列三》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

 

Life then was fulfilled with originality and simplicity. I had such complete satisfaction that I felt no ending was needed by my Chinese novel. It was a perfect year of teaching. The perfection nurtured me as an oasis of spirituality. I was inspired to experience more.

 

---"Observing Series IV", Shantou, 2009.12 | 《观察系列四》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

—“Observing Series IV”, Shantou, 2009.12 | 《观察系列四》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

 

Therefore I moved to Shenzhen, working in sales till I quit to write two English novels within four years. I then came to Shanghai out of curiosity and tried to sell insurance. I stumbled into the art world.

 

---"To Be Remembered", Shantou, 2009.12 | 《学生留念》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

—“To Be Remembered”, Shantou, 2009.12 | 《学生留念》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

 

However, my family claimed that I was absolutely wrong. They repeated it during my August family trip morning, noon and night. Their biting criticisms almost crushed me. I had to compromise with the idea of returning to education. Actually it felt more like the sand in my hourglass was running out and it was time to start over.

 

---"To Be Remembered", Shantou, 2009.12 | 《学生留念》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

—“To Be Remembered”, Shantou, 2009.12 | 《学生留念》摄于汕头民工子弟学校

 

Now I’m officially working for New Stage English and teaching international chess at different international schools. Because of this job, I have seen remote parts of Shanghai that I would never have visited.

 

---"I Love China", Shanghai, 2019.12.25 | 《我爱中国》摄于上海青浦世外国际幼儿园

—“I Love China”, Shanghai, 2019.12.25 | 《我爱中国》摄于上海青浦世外国际幼儿园

 

All this happened from 2009 to 2019. It is only a decade. Only a circle. How would you like to begin a new life, if you happen to be at the starting line?

 

WeChat Image_20191229104559

 

Last article 上一篇: Our Pressures | 我们的压力

About Heather Cai:

Heather Cover

Heather is the daughter of a subsistence rice farmer from Fujian Province, China. She tells stories from her experience as one of the poorest. She writes her dream to share with the world, a very personal place. She has now written two English literary novels and is looking to being published in the UK. Her passion is a splendid cocktail or milkshake of word, image, music and art. She likes collecting books, DVDs, papers, stones, shells and leaves. She desires for all forms of natural beauty. She is currently teaching kids chess in Shanghai.

Copyright © 2018-2019 Heather Cai. All Rights Reserved. 所有版权归作者蔡太莲所有!


Follow HeathersChamber for more original poems, essays, prose, drawings and pictures

关注阿太的密室,订阅更多原创诗歌、散文、随笔、画画和图片

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My First UK Customer

Photo taken in Yunnan.

When the heaven’s cock got a real hard erection, the world is simply black and white.

Foreword: 

After I decided to write my dream, I quit this full-time job in 2013. Honestly I’m not any material to make any money. The more I work on money, the more I despise it. It’s a stroke of luck that I finally left a shitty place for this job as a sales girl. Surely this job made me know more people like our Portuguese Manager and some Chinese hard-working  girls. Yet it saddened me in many ways, like I trusted the company and believed what I was told in the interview. One day the accountant made a big mistake on my monthly salary, and I found that the company had paid my basic salary as rmb2800, which was supposed to be rmb3000, for half a year. I studied and started everything from ZERO, alone. Through the whole time I had to search in despair and make cold phone calls worldwide with hope for a customer without having any account of my own in Alibaba or Globalsource. So on that day in March 2013, one of the old sales girls, Lisa, let me use her account on Alibaba and this fun dark humor happened, purely and shockingly.

Heather Cai (17:01:30):
hello Do you have any inquiry of USB & Memory cards? power banks?
Marilou Baylis (17:02:11):
FUCK OFF YELLOW PEOPLE
Heather Cai (17:03:17):
Sorry to disturb such impolite WHATEVER
Marilou Baylis (17:03:33):
piss off
Heather Cai (17:03:45):
FUCK OFF –back to you
Marilou Baylis (17:04:10):
SUCK MY BIG COCK 🙂
Heather Cai (17:04:49):
I can suck WHATEVER kinda cock, not your type.
BTW: What’s the color of your mysterious COCK ?
Marilou Baylis (17:05:44):
CAN I CUM UP YOU BABY ? BIG WHITE COCK FOR YOU HONEY
Heather Cai (17:06:44):
EXCUSE ME,BIG WHITE COCK
Marilou Baylis (17:07:46):
can i meet you ?
Heather Cai (17:09:33):
fuck off white cock I am YELLOW as you already FUCKED OFF
Marilou Baylis (17:09:59):
have you picture ?
can i cum in your pussy ?
Heather Cai (17:11:13):
Go fuck off yourself
Marilou Baylis (17:11:35):
i would like to fuck you ?
Heather Cai (17:11:59):
If so, i prefer to fuck myself with my middle finger
Marilou Baylis (17:12:27):
you make me hot hot hot
Heather Cai (17:13:11):
Then F*CK yourself in front of a mirror on ur face
Marilou Baylis (17:13:45):
send me a picture please of you ?
i would like you to be my girl friend ?
Heather Cai (17:14:19):
NO WAY
Marilou Baylis (17:15:03):
you make me very sad 😦
Heather Cai (17:15:41):
Make yourself YELLOW, Then i will fuck u badly
my bfs are queueing in The Great Wall
Marilou Baylis (17:16:56):
you must be good in bed ?
Heather Cai (17:17:12):
Silent
Marilou Baylis (17:17:36):
ok that fine with me baby
send me picture of you ? i think you very pretty and sexy 🙂
Heather Cai (17:18:44):
Speechless
Marilou Baylis (17:19:56):
how old are you ?
Heather Cai (17:20:09):
Secret
Marilou Baylis (17:21:39):
are you getting hot ?
Heather Cai (17:22:08):
Unknowable
Marilou Baylis (17:24:46):
miss you
Marilou Baylis (17:26:17):
bye lisa
Heather Cai (17:26:52):
I am not Lisa
Marilou Baylis (17:27:22):
whats your real name ?
Heather Cai (17:27:34):
Can u make ur eyes wide open on HEATHER CAI
Marilou Baylis (17:28:01):
dont no
Marilou Baylis (17:29:41):
is that your name heather cai ?
Heather Cai (17:29:50):
YES
Marilou Baylis (17:30:31):
thats good
my name is shane
Heather Cai (17:30:58):
Shane or shame shame?
Marilou Baylis (17:31:12):
shane
Heather Cai (17:31:39):
Oh, yeah. I just forgot a movie also SHANE not Shame
while i liked it to be Shame
Marilou Baylis (17:32:05):
thats the one the cowboy film
Heather Cai (17:32:14):
Yup
Marilou Baylis (17:33:13):
have you picture of you ? could you send me ?
Heather Cai (17:34:00):
Come to meet me in Futian district, Shenzhen city, China
I will give u a real pic of ME-Heather Cai
Marilou Baylis (17:34:32):
its a long way
Heather Cai (17:34:51):
and a long way to NOWHERE
So forget it
Marilou Baylis (17:35:22):
please send pic ?
Heather Cai (17:35:59):
Paint your BIG COCK in YELLOW, i may think about it
Marilou Baylis (17:36:45):
ok
Marilou Baylis (17:38:26):
bye heather cai
Heather Cai (17:41:48):
bye white cock
Marilou Baylis (17:42:47):
mmmmmmuuuaaahh
Afterword:
To me, sadly this is more cultural than sexual. A German friend who brought me a really nice bottle of German Icy wine and different boxes of chocolates from Germany and with whom I had “luxury” food and drinks and talked a big deal in real and online. Yet, during our last dinner in March 2013, first his face turned purple and his eyes deadly white, then after dinner he at once deleted me from his Wechat, a while later he deleted me from his Skype, after I showed him that, which I thought he would understand me better.